Not a lot

It's amazing how much easier to write it is after reading someone else's writing. It's also amazing how tempting it is to adopt their style, which can be both freeing and weird, because on the one hand, I like trying new things, but on the other, I feel as though it is disingenuous somehow.

It is easy to forget how much I like writing. I started this entry a few hours ago, and it started feeling like work. Like I was obligated to start recounting my experiences from this weekend because that's what I do. I talk about what has happened. But as soon as it started to feel like work, I closed my computer. And now, sure enough, I feel like writing again. But not very much like writing about my weekend.

Don't get me wrong: my weekend was amazing. Frisbee was fun, and the parts I was apprehensive about went about as expected (which is better than I was expecting somehow (don't think about that too much)). And to top it off, I even played well, which was actually better than expected. I think I did something cool in almost every category. I had some great long throws (both forehand and backhand), I had some great break throws (both forehand and backhand), I skied someone, I caught a sweet layout, I got a D on a 50/50 shot, and I got a layout D. I didn't get a solid handblock (touched the disc once though). I didn't get a layout D on an under cut. I didn't throw any lefty throws. I threw 3-4(?) turnovers on Saturday, and a few more on Sunday (probably around 10 on the weekend?) A couple were bad decisions. A couple were poorly executed good decisions. Two were miscommunication. The pros outweigh the cons. I am content. Oh, and I don't think I dropped a pass I got a hand on, which is good for me.

I am still awkward socially. However, I counteract that by bragging a lot and trying to be funny. This may or may not have any good results. Whatever. I'm beginning to care even less. At least most of the people there knew me.

People complimented me a lot. It felt good. One person even said he was impressed I had made some good plays. I remarked that he sounded surprised, and he responded "no, like, athletic plays!" (Does that make it better? Still good. I'll take it.)

I miss frisbee, but I might not miss frisbee with people I don't know. It's hard to tell.

I'm bored writing about it. I'll probably come back to the weekend at some later point.

My trademarks final was awful. Hopefully everyone feels that way.

The weather is nice. I'm going to keep running I think. I started running because my shoulder was hurt and I wanted to stay in shape. (I'm not too out of shape compared to people who play frisbee.) My shoulder doesn't feel any worse than it did before the weekend. I am very happy about this. I need to figure out how I'm going to travel to handball tournaments this summer.

The girl I was planning on seeing again didn't ever get in touch with me again. I guess she wasn't interested. That's fine. I don't know what I want anyway. I wonder if the girls I've been out with give me a second thought. I think about things too much. At least it's easier to be alone (for now anyway), knowing that I'm not missing out on a lot by not dating.

The experience was not a complete waste. I try to take away something useful from my interactions, and I think each person I met did give me something I feel could be helpful moving forward. In order:
1) having high standards is fine
2) floss (she was big on flossing; I floss every day now!)
3) trust your instincts
4) some people just want to meet new people
5) have something in common (I guess? this was a little fuzzy)
6) trust your instincts (dummy); also, being blunt is okay sometimes
7) ? (still figuring this out; probably just because it goes well doesn't mean they're interested enough to continue, but maybe just that music is a strong memory trigger)

And that's just the girls I met in person. Most of the girls I messaged with and didn't meet can be boiled down into: If people seem immature or too casual, it's probably true. Also, if you think you're risking scaring someone away, you have probably already scared them away.

In the many months I spent not updating this blog, I kept writing topics in my phone I wanted to write about. I suppose it's about time I got to some of them. I also started a lot of poems. If I finish them, I'll let you know.

Actually, I'm just going to post this and get on with my life for the moment. I'll be back though. There are only one or two more tasks before my semester is over, so I'm bound to convince myself writing here is a good idea (either because I want to avoid them, or because I have more time). Thanks for reading!